100!


Today marks the 100th post on Veggie Macabre. It’s not that big of a deal but I have been known to throw parties for triple coupon day at Target. So today will be no different in the fact that I will walk around the office with a false sense of accomplishment. People will ask me how I am and I will say, “pretty fucking great, pissface” and high five them. During the Monday morning mandatory meeting (MMMM…) I will make a motion that every Friday will be “Hawaiian shirt day” or at least “short sleeve button down with tie day”. After work I will go to the running track and try and race every jogger I see and at the end I’ll dump water on my head and repeat, “I just never stopped believing…i never stopped.” Later in the evening I will go to the bar, alone, and order one bourbon, one scotch and one beer and start a discussion that George Thorougood looks goofy in comparison to how he sounds. Big teeth. And before I go to bed, I will read over the past eleven months on Veggie Macabre and reflect how life has changed, both for the good as well as the bad and be thankful for all I have.

So for this 100th post I think I’ll keep to the same theme of no theme. He are some pictures I took on my camera phone from the past couple of weeks. I know a few are of poor quality but then again, it’s a camera phone. So here you are, a look into my world.

I have passed this guy a few times on the commute to work. It’s no doubt he’s a little special but hey, he can ride a bike. Notice the ballistic sand/snow goggles, the Styrofoam helmet and the fingerless gloves? God bless him, he makes my day. Especially when I see him going up a hill. Old boy really works that bike.

For F’ sake, Pizza World finally went under. It’s a sad day when mom and pop restaurants like this get gobbled up by corporate crapheads. There are never enough places like Pizza World, Sandwich Planet or Rocket Burger. I guess it’s the space theme I really enjoy. R.I.P. Pizza World.

This is a real house. No shit, it’s a real house and two elderly people live there. The rumor is back in the 60’s, when this town had a population under 500, the guy promised his wife she would one day live in a castle. He made good on his word and he built this. I don’t think she was expecting a putt-putt castle, though. It even has a mote and gnomes that guard the entrance. It’s funny but most people are awaiting the day the owners open the doors for an open house, much like Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

At least there is one guy that isn’t European still holding on to the Zoo Pants. I caught this at the grocery store and it took me at least five pictures to get this one. He was on a mission to buy vitamins I suppose. Regardless, most of the store was aware of my picture taking and I immediately had to fake a phone call. You know you have too.

People who decorate the rear widow of their car with stuffed animals give me the heebs. I don’t know why people feel this is a good idea. I bet you the person driving this car is sporting an airbrushed t-shirt from their 1998 vacation to Panama City, Florida. Ooooo, I’m a shit.

Played some golf with clients last week and it turns out I really need more practice. Ever since I hit a dudes house a few years ago that erupted into a violent altercation, I have been anti-golf. But, you have to go where the money is and it turned out to be pretty lucrative, Even though most of my shots looked like this.

Every so often I go out to trendy night spots. This one was my favorite. It’s small, quaint, artsy and the people don’t get puke drunk and fall into you, causing beer to get on a new sports jacket. Not that has happened. I find myself repulsed by bars that require bouncers. Another bonus, the TV’s have Dr. Seuss cartoons on all the time. Weird.

I didn’t know having to take a piss was a privilage, privalage, pri-vo-lege, privilege. (whew) I haven’t lost that right since the Army. This was taken at a fortune 500 company building in Atlanta of all places. It’s a clear example of someone who has some leadership power and no idea how to handle it. Of course I wrote “O’Doyle Rules” on the wall.

So, in keeping with my random theme of Veggie Macabre, that is what is on my phone. The quality is never the best but I love having the ability to capture a moment in time to share or force on people. The 100th post isn’t that huge of a mile mark but I think I have at least 100 more. So cheers, tomorrow is 101.

23 Comments

  1. when your done celebrating with your bourbon, scotch and beer please drink a pina colada for me, cause I like dancing in the rain ๐Ÿ˜›

    Congrats

  2. …I am into champagne. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  3. I’m glad I started reading your blog b/c it cracks me up! Here’s to another 100 more.

  4. Nice way to blur out that person’s license plate, Will.

    I love that pizza world sign. I would totally try to snab it in the out of business liquidation sale. Now if only they named their business pizza planet the sign would be a thousand times better. I have a feeling that lot will sit for months and months or turn into a laundrymat. Washers and dryers and a quarters machine world? hmmm….

    Here’s to 100 posts. I probably won’t make that on my blog, I just aint someone to write as much as you do. I almost have 100 videos though on youtube. I am a 21st century digital girl what can I say.

  5. Too funny! Congrats on your 100th blog post…Kind of funny, I just hit my 50th blog post, and was just as excited!!

    And yeah, stuffed animals in the back of cars and air-brushed t-shirts just seem to go together for some strange reason…and yes, both should give you the heebeegeebees.

  6. Congrats on the 100th post! Now I know who the weird guy taking pictures of me while I was buying vitamins was! And I guess that was you taking pictures of me in my car as well huh? Kidding, keep up the great work, can’t wait to read your next entry.

  7. What a neat idea, bill!
    It’s a shame that i don’t have pictures HALF as interesting as yours.
    Maybe I’ll try something like this in the future.
    And congrats, my man! Good on you! Home I get that far!

  8. I demand pics of your graffiti. Excellent post sir. Congrats!
    And what’s with the office and the clients, you’re no longer flying?

  9. wow, 100? i think your 101st entry should be a nude pictorial.

  10. Happy 100th.

    On my drive to school two semesters ago, every Monday and Wednesday at around 9 a.m., I’d pass by a small bus stop, usually with only one person waiting there. That man, probably around 20 or so (also probably “special”), always had headphones on and would never be sitting down. He’d also be lip-syncing emphatically to his music while dancing on the sidewalk with every inch of his body. Totally and thoroughly jamming out. Cars would pass by, many would honk, people would wave, but the kid just kept jammin’ out on the sidewalk, totally absorbed in the music and his dancing. That kid was one of the most special people I’ve ever seen. I wish I knew what he was listening to.

    It was impossible to have a bad day after seeing him.

    When I was late one morning, I actually saw when his bus arrived. He was composed and looked like any other person on the street while he calmly boarded the bus.

  11. Congrats on your hundredth post!
    This is a fitting post for #100, I feel like pictures snapped on the fly like this give a better insight into a person than less candid ones. I feel like now I kinda know what it would be like to hang out with Will for a day. I just last night got a bunch of pictures from 04-06 from my old cell phone that were a total flashback to flip through. My favorite at the moment is this picture of a tomato that looks like a butt: http://pics.livejournal.com/squee4242/pic/000279t1/

  12. Sorry Squee! I don’t know how you were put in the Spam section. But now you are not.
    Love the tomato. That probably would save it from being eaten. The curse is the blessing.

  13. Congratulations!
    I had pants nearly identical to those just with more yellow.
    MAN was I one stylin kid!!

  14. i think if we actually knew each other, we would be the very best of friends in real life. but part of me doesn’t really want to stop communicating solely through pixellated blog comments and links. a small part. a very small part.

  15. I think we would be too. Warning though, I require secret handshakes and an occasional fist bump.

  16. I’m sorry… but when did the US military dictate about urine extraction? Thank God I never enlisted because telling me I had lost my privilege to tinkle would have pushed me over the edge. Come to think about it, the ONLY thing I remember from 10th grade biology (thanks to having a coach for a teacher) is the word ‘homostasis’ (w probably misspelled but remember I had a coach for a teacher) which means: a biological life process. I’m pretty sure peeing falls into that category, Uncle Sam, and biology wins every time.

  17. Actually in basic training they made us drink two canteens of water and sit in a classroom with no bathroom breaks. It was a discipline lesson I guess. I have witnessed many a grown man piss themselves and no one thought less of them. Now a days I would rather be waterboarded.

  18. “He was on a mission to buy vitamins I suppose. Regardless, most of the store was aware of my picture taking and I immediately had to fake a phone call. You know you have too.”…

    ..vitamins…LMAO…and holy crap, it is sooo crucial to fake a phone-call so you don’t get fingered (?) as a creepo and have security tailing you…I once tried to snap a pic of a chick across from me on the train…she had a 6th finger growing out of the space between her index finger and her thumb…it wasn’t fully developed, i.e. it was dangly and it looked like all the bone-structure hadn’t formed…kind of like when people are born with a half-developed fetus-twin growing out of their neck or something….???

    But yeah, total true story, I was just too close to discreetly snap the pic.

    PS: I only recently joined your following, but congrats on 100! ๐Ÿ™‚

  19. Congrats, man! I’m relatively new to VM, but I’ll be around for the next 100, you can count on it.

  20. Your blog is absolutely hilarious! kudos times 3!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. I swear, I’m not joking, I was parked next to the goober with the doggies in the back windshield the other day at Publix! I remember because Rylan caught a glimpse of them as we were getting out of the car and yelled “doggies!”. As if it wasn’t disturbing enough to notice, the 100 year old couple that owned the car was getting out as my little one noticed the little critters and were just tickled that he was amused by them….enough so that the little old hunchback man took a second to shove on the car to show my two year old that not only were they puppies BUT they are all ALSO bobble-head puppies…what a world…..swear it…SO not joking. Hahahaha!

    Great post my dear, congrats on the 100th post!

  22. Hey, I clicked onto your blog from the x-e page and noticed the castle/house. I was surprised to see it because I didn’t know there were any other Georgians who frequented the x-e site. Anyway, great post.

  23. Hey Faith! Yeah, I live in Roswell. Glad you popped by.


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